sleepless fury

february the 10th

I didn't get much sleep last night. Hell, I never do. But today I woke up and I realized that I had it again. That dream.

Ever since I was about 13 I had been having this one dream that I always remembered. See, I don't remember that many dreams, except for when I'm really sick or something. And there are only two that I can fully recall (when I wasn't sick). The first one was of me falling, and I dreamt that almost everyday between the ages of 11 to 15. Then they stopped. Don't ask me why, but they did. But this dream that I've been having since I was 13... I thought it had stopped as well, until today. The last time I got it was about 3 months ago.

Each time I dream it, it varies, but it keeps to the same vague outline. I'm doing something, anything (last night I was playing lacrosse by myself in a dark field.. just throwing the ball into the darkness, and then something would throw it back at me) when all of a sudden from all around me I hear this tremendous laughter. Everything starts to shake for about 20 minutes. I'm frantic. I look around trying to get safe, but it's dark all around me, so I opt to just stay still, but I'm still freaking out. Anyhow, after everything stops shaking a woman with a calm, sexy voice speaks out of the darkness and says, "You're 21?"...

...and then I fall down dead.

I've learned to deal with that dream. It used to bother me, but I never told anyone. Well, except for my ex-girlfriend but she's too far from me now to even care. But a year after that dream started becoming regular, I started not to care. I still don't, except for one minor factor: why have the dreams started again after being dormant for 3 months? Oh well. Maybe I'll find out when I'm 21.

yesterday | history | names | subscribe | palesky | tomorrow