monday, april 10, 2000 11:58:16 pm

altered states

last friday my sisters had a little party. a small party. a small party where they were expecting around 60 people. small party. there i was standing in my house filled with a bunch of sophmores and freshmen in high school. ah, to be that young again. young girls running around flirting with young boys that left every couple of hours (probably to smoke a bowl or two, they certainly reeked of it when they came back). ah, to be that young again.

of course, this situation could only come up if a certain prerequisite was complete. and this was:

my dad not being here.

oh yeah, i think i forgot to mention that. my dad has been out of town for the last couple of weeks. so you can easily imagine a young person sitting on the couch thinking "my dad is out of town". now, after thinking this, it is almost unheard of for the thought of "party" not to come up within the next 30 seconds. i've had a few "randall" parties in my time, so it was only fit that my sisters did the same thing.

so i quietly drank from a bottle of grolsch, trying to act responsible, as i was the only person there above the age of 18 (i was feeling quite old) while my sisters' friends came filing through the front door one by one. i was asked to dance, to which i replied "no". i was asked if they could drink some beer, to which i also replied "no". i was asked to play suck and blow.... to which i replied "no". ah, to be that young again.

gary and jack came over after a couple of hours. i was getting pretty bored trying to pretend that i was more responsible than every one else in the house, so i called them up so we could drink some beer and do some white. they wanted to smoke too, but since i was thinking that i was going to have to interact with a few parents, i had to turn that option down. or at least until most of my sisters' friends were gone.

too much white can make someone feel pretty icky, despite feeling pretty amped. by the time 4 o'clock rolled around, i was getting sick of smoking, drinking and playing video games. i crashed and dreamt dreams of purple skies and snapple filled lakes.

i woke up several hours later knowing that i had a party to go to. a dead party. a dead party at my house. shit.

i got wasted. i started drinking at around 3:30 in the afternoon, while people slowly filled in. the house was filled with people that i didn't know, with drugs being passed around like it was christmas. bowls were being lighted, liquid was being dropped, alcohol was being consumed. people were cooking burritos, bringing in grateful dead cakes, and lighting cigarettes. we had a projection system up to show all sorts of trippy eye candy movies, while people stormed back and forth in a pretty inebriated fashion.

i got wasted.

when i finally got to bed, i could remember people wandering around my floor aimlessly looking for god knows what. i was too exhausted to object to them wandering somewhere where they shouldn't have been in the first place, but since they were probably only looking for a place to crash, i really didn't care.

my lungs hurt the next day. two straight nights of bodily abuse does that to me. so of course the first thing i did was light a cigarette. what would life be without nicotine? probably a helluva lot better, but if it wasn't tobacco, my life would probably be filled with some other kind of vice. i puffed in slowly, celebrating the end of two interesting nights.

life seems so much brighter. now all i need is someone to share the light with.

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