wednesday, february 03, 1999 4:49:52 pm
ah. well, the month is february, and i have finally begun to stop
dating everything with 1998. i've always found that after the new
year's party, that the actual new year was annoying because of
everything that i would have to get used to. i've probably already
dated several checks with '98, which can be a severe pain in the ass in
some cases... ah well. no doubt they will be sent back to yours truly
in a few days.
i find it funny that even though my school breaks are around two and a
half weeks long, it takes be much longer than that to get used to the fact
that i'm in school again. it's such a pain to be responsible. if i
could have it my way, i'd probably just stay in my house and sleep the
daylight hours away. it would seem appropriate - that's what i pretty
much do anyway. if it weren't for the 4 hour periods where i actually
have to get up around noon to go to school, i'd no doubt not bother waking up until 4 in the evening.
you may have already surmised the fact that my sleeping habits have gone
even more haywire. when it became a habit of falling asleep two hours
past midnight, it was tolerable. now i find myself staying up until the
wee hours of the morn, only catching precious rest when the skies that can
be seen out my windows begin to lighten up with the coming of the sun. and
it's not like i want to stay awake until 5 or 6 in the morning. on the
contrary, i often try to fall asleep at least around 2, but midnight or
even eleven would be most desirable. but there i'll be, just laying in
bed as i watch my alarm clock slowly count forward... 2:31, 2:32, 2:33 -
and then suddenly it's 5:34. often i'd just give up and proceed to surf
the 'net as always, or try another design experiment out.
this can't be healthy.
on a lighter note, i've decided to save money. money, money, money.
lately, money has been on my mind a lot. my vast fortune (haha) still
remains untouched (which it probably will for awhile, i'm sure there are
those of you that understand why :), however i find that my actual
spending money until the year 2005 has diminished to pathetically low
amounts. this realization has resulted in several things:
first, to save my rapidly depleting educational scholarship fund, i have
transferred (once again, groan) schools. this decision has not only
allowed a major drop in tuition payments, but i'll also save money by
not having to drive so far, or live at another place. the downside of
this? i'll be living with my argumentative father.
second, i basically don't leave the house on weekdays, except to go to
school. even with the surprising drop in gas prices, i'll still be saving a
ton by not driving endlessly to places i've never been to just for the
hell of it, which i did quite often. it's a habit when you decide to
alienate yourself for no apparent reason. however, it goes beyond that.
by not leaving the house i also avoid the powerful temptation of buying
anything that i see which is remotely interesting. and i find a lot of
things interesting. hell, one day i spent over a hundred bucks on those
beast wars transformers, just because i liked watching the show, was a
big fan of the original tf's, and because i like toys. and let's not
even talk about comics, books, cd's, or computer goodies.
lastly, i now refuse to carry cash in my wallet beyond twenty dollars.
i usually was in the habit of carrying large amounts of money (i no
doubt would have been a muggers dream victim), which also lead to me make
ridiculous impromptu purchases or either drugs, alcohol or food. not to
mention the other goodies that were stated in the previous paragraph.
now that i'm done giving my "lighter note", let's get back to the
nitty-gritty. the fighting in my house still hasn't subsided. my
father and i mostly avoid each other beyond our dinner table
conversations, yet we still manage to argue about something. last
sunday, i came home before midnight (which is ALWAYS a rarity when i go
out), and mr. dadd-io came down and started yelling at me for no
apparent reason. i proceeded to agree with him just so that i could get
him off my case and he would leave, but it seemed like my decision to
not argue with him only fueled his desire to yell even further. i eventually mentioned something along the lines of "did you come down here just so you could just yell at me?", which promptly shut him up.
on monday i had a conversation with rissa. she and i have been actually
getting along quite well, despite our rocky past. the conversation was
rather drab and pretty depressing, as she kept mentioning every other
minute how completely "down" i sounded. sadly, it was true. i found
that my voice was monotonous, my thoughts lethargic, and my body full
of sighs. however, we proceeded to talk about what was going on in each
others life (pretty much nothing on my end, and the usual for her).
suffice to say we didn't talk long.
and now it's wednesday. i remember how i was telling james a few days
back how i hated saying wednesday phonetically. wed-nes-day. i doesn't
makes sense. i guess that would be one of the reasons why they say that
english is one of the hardest languages to learn. so many
different rules of conjugation, pronunciation, annunciation... all that
stuff. i'm glad i grew up on english (somewhat). god knows if i were
learning it, i'd probably be terrible, as i'm terrible with most languages. funny
thing is, i can pull off a french or filipino accent no problem,
but getting me to speak it is a whole different matter. you have to
give me some credit though - i'm pretty good at understanding both
french and tagalog (the main filipino dialog), but for some reason my
mind can't calculate it fast enough, or properly for that matter, so
that i might be able to communicate with those that speak those
languages. ah well. anyway, i've decided that if i want to learn
those languages, i'd probably have to totally immerse myself within the
respective culture. i'd probably learn it no problem then.
school. school for the most part has been what i've always thought of
it. boring and seemingly useless. actually, i'm terribly over
critical of school. to be totally honest, i do learn a lot from
attending classes and reading those unentertaining text books... but WHY
does it have to be so boring all the time?
i have found some refuge though. my two evening classes (and
coincidentally, the only evening classes i've ever had) are extremely
entertaining. my first is public speaking, which is something i've always enjoyed.
the class also consists of an abnormal large amount of attractive
looking woman, which is always a good thing in my book. my prof is
pretty cool too. he constantly is trying to find interesting ways to
keep the information he feeds us interesting, usually by forcing us to
work in groups, which i always find much more entertaining than having
to listen to someone lecture straight from the book. my other class is
psychology. this class also consist of attractive women, however
to smaller degree. but it's also where i met kelly, and i've only
got good things to say about her. unfortunately, our prof teaches
straight from the book, BUT he often goes off into odd tangents trying
to explain all the stories, terms, and other psychology stuff, which
usually results in most of the class laughing at his dry-witted humor.
Suffice to say, he's been one of the more interesting "lecture" prof's
i've ever had.
work is almost non-existant. i have since put my two weeks notice at the
bookstore, although they keep calling asking if i'd like to work for
them on weekends from time to time. seeing that i'm currently unemployed (for
the most part) and have decided to try to save money, the offer is
excruciatingly tempting. i'll probably cave in in a few days or weeks,
but for now i'm going to stand my ground. but god, how i love my 33%
discounts. NO! MUST SAVE MONEY.
i have however submitted a few website proposals to several companies in
my area, and a few are contemplating the idea. so far only a temp
agency that i used to work for has agreed to hire me, but they've not
yet decided when. they did hint that it would be within two weeks,
which would be nice. big bucks, big bucks, big bucks! what were those
things called again? "whammies"? well, it will be nice having some sort of
well, i'm on my way out. i need to take some pictures for this journal
entry and 7mm, so that's what i'm going to do. by the way, i have
decided to kill the annoying sparseness of palesky.com and have added
renditions, which is basically my old poetry journal in digital format.
for the most part the "poetry" is actually quite atrocious, but i put
too much hard work into typing out those 120 pages of poetry code, so
i might as well, no? anyhow, i'll be seeing you.